Friday, December 31, 2010
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Mirror of the future
I had the pleasure of sitting between two elderly women on a full flight from Salt Lake City to Las Vegas. During the course of the flight, I spoke briefly with both women before analyzing my encounter with each, and the value.
The woman in the window seat was sophisticated and glamorous. She wore a short haircut (Halle Berry style), silver and fabulous. Her clothing style was eclectic and polished. She came across as a retired actress or artist of some sort.
The woman in the aisle seat reminded moreso of a retired teacher or social worker. She carried a more classic, casual style of dress, and wore her hair curled but short in the back - more tailored for a boutique look.
I felt I was sandwiched between San Francisco and West Palm Beach, if that makes sense.
At some point during the one hour flight, it occurred to me that each of these women represented one portion of myself. I was being mirrored, in the future, on each side of my physical and inner personality.
One woman read an original short story which had been types and sent to her, while the other read a traditional novel on a Kindle. The same woman, in theory, but so very different.
My personal struggle for a sense of style, glamour, and fabulosity constantly challenges my desire to just be. The inner growth vs the social perception of who I am. My desire to learn and grow and not care how others perceive me and my internal need to achieve what I want to accomplish in this lifetime financially and socially as well.
We are all conflicted with what society deems successful and what the universe gifts us and is indeed innately successful. And how do we achieve and balance both?
Watching them.
Thinking about how I will age.
What will I take away from this lifetime, finally?
The woman in the window seat was sophisticated and glamorous. She wore a short haircut (Halle Berry style), silver and fabulous. Her clothing style was eclectic and polished. She came across as a retired actress or artist of some sort.
The woman in the aisle seat reminded moreso of a retired teacher or social worker. She carried a more classic, casual style of dress, and wore her hair curled but short in the back - more tailored for a boutique look.
I felt I was sandwiched between San Francisco and West Palm Beach, if that makes sense.
At some point during the one hour flight, it occurred to me that each of these women represented one portion of myself. I was being mirrored, in the future, on each side of my physical and inner personality.
One woman read an original short story which had been types and sent to her, while the other read a traditional novel on a Kindle. The same woman, in theory, but so very different.
My personal struggle for a sense of style, glamour, and fabulosity constantly challenges my desire to just be. The inner growth vs the social perception of who I am. My desire to learn and grow and not care how others perceive me and my internal need to achieve what I want to accomplish in this lifetime financially and socially as well.
We are all conflicted with what society deems successful and what the universe gifts us and is indeed innately successful. And how do we achieve and balance both?
Watching them.
Thinking about how I will age.
What will I take away from this lifetime, finally?
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Connecting
The Universe is an amazing place. The concept of the earth and all the planets, the sun and the moon is so vaste - no human will ever have the capacity to wrap their head around what an expansive, energized powerful world we live in.
I have always been intrigued with the concept of fate. What drives fate? The power of the universe and human thought. Karma. Effective, powerful thinking - in terms of making things happen for you. Positive thinking in terms of change. Are we indeed all catalysts for our path?
I believe so.
I do believe firmly that every step you take is a force to making your life work for you.
The power of thought is beyond any physical force you can imagine.
I have a hundred stories, if I have one, of the power of thought and how my life has benefited from the power of my own mind.
I have always believed that success comes from hard work and integrity. This is how I live my life. Exuding positive energy from the moment I wake up until I drop with the moonlight is part of what makes me feel accomplished. Being honest without hurting people. Not being a user. Giving 100% because it's the right thing to do, not because someone tells me to - because your actions do affect people. The cycle of intent is even more powerful than actions themselves.
I had a difficult year. I finally found a great job in a great environment with people that I like, doing something I really love - after a year of unemployment and a tremendously desperate outlook. My integrity for success kept me afloat for a long time. After finding a great career match, I struggled with the after effects that a year of unemployment imposes. I kept my head up. I never let a day go by when I did not remember I was a role model to two amazing kids that I would never let go without - without food, without shelter, without pride.
I tried to never get ahead of myself in my worry. Never think about next month...just get through the day, and the week. Slowly but surely, this year got better. I caught up on my current financial issues. I paid back borrowed monies. I pay my rent on time. I looked forward to the end of the year, the holiday season, and New Years Eve (which is my favorite holiday) as the renewed life of my lifestyle. Getting back on my feet has never been so important or so integral to my future and the future of my kids.
I didn't know if I would be able to afford Christmas presents, or not, this year, and not that I didn't care, but I was so happy to have food and a home that it really didn't matter. Somehow, I had gotten through the year with the help of my friends, carpooling my children to and from school while I worked, lending a hand when I couldn't see the reach. My friends (and neighbors) showed up, and I can't thank them or be grateful enough - Douglas, Jessi, Rhonda, and at the end Jen & Scott - you have no idea how much your generosity has meant to me when I had no one to help me. I was reminded constantly that I am alone then quickly reminded that I have a circle of love around me bigger than my physical boundaries. And I am grateful.
I met a generous soul at the airport (which seems to be the conduit for all my energy lately), and this person was kind enough to give me tickets to a football game. This seems like a simple thing, but I would never have been able to afford such a gift for my son this year, and to see his favorite team to boot...my environment and the positive energy I create, again, gifted me with something for my children. At Christmas.
I was lucky enough to meet some great people this year who have done great things for me and never made me feel inadequate because I had a hard year. I have been humbled and revived.
I am blessed.
I will never deny the power of thought, the power of attraction, and the gift of the universe if you are open and believe.
I have always been intrigued with the concept of fate. What drives fate? The power of the universe and human thought. Karma. Effective, powerful thinking - in terms of making things happen for you. Positive thinking in terms of change. Are we indeed all catalysts for our path?
I believe so.
I do believe firmly that every step you take is a force to making your life work for you.
The power of thought is beyond any physical force you can imagine.
I have a hundred stories, if I have one, of the power of thought and how my life has benefited from the power of my own mind.
I have always believed that success comes from hard work and integrity. This is how I live my life. Exuding positive energy from the moment I wake up until I drop with the moonlight is part of what makes me feel accomplished. Being honest without hurting people. Not being a user. Giving 100% because it's the right thing to do, not because someone tells me to - because your actions do affect people. The cycle of intent is even more powerful than actions themselves.
I had a difficult year. I finally found a great job in a great environment with people that I like, doing something I really love - after a year of unemployment and a tremendously desperate outlook. My integrity for success kept me afloat for a long time. After finding a great career match, I struggled with the after effects that a year of unemployment imposes. I kept my head up. I never let a day go by when I did not remember I was a role model to two amazing kids that I would never let go without - without food, without shelter, without pride.
I tried to never get ahead of myself in my worry. Never think about next month...just get through the day, and the week. Slowly but surely, this year got better. I caught up on my current financial issues. I paid back borrowed monies. I pay my rent on time. I looked forward to the end of the year, the holiday season, and New Years Eve (which is my favorite holiday) as the renewed life of my lifestyle. Getting back on my feet has never been so important or so integral to my future and the future of my kids.
I didn't know if I would be able to afford Christmas presents, or not, this year, and not that I didn't care, but I was so happy to have food and a home that it really didn't matter. Somehow, I had gotten through the year with the help of my friends, carpooling my children to and from school while I worked, lending a hand when I couldn't see the reach. My friends (and neighbors) showed up, and I can't thank them or be grateful enough - Douglas, Jessi, Rhonda, and at the end Jen & Scott - you have no idea how much your generosity has meant to me when I had no one to help me. I was reminded constantly that I am alone then quickly reminded that I have a circle of love around me bigger than my physical boundaries. And I am grateful.
I met a generous soul at the airport (which seems to be the conduit for all my energy lately), and this person was kind enough to give me tickets to a football game. This seems like a simple thing, but I would never have been able to afford such a gift for my son this year, and to see his favorite team to boot...my environment and the positive energy I create, again, gifted me with something for my children. At Christmas.
I was lucky enough to meet some great people this year who have done great things for me and never made me feel inadequate because I had a hard year. I have been humbled and revived.
I am blessed.
I will never deny the power of thought, the power of attraction, and the gift of the universe if you are open and believe.
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
The Holidays
"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times"...Charles Dickens had something there.
You see the best of human spirit and kindness and the worst of mankind come out during the holidays. Just add liquor and too much sugar...
I look forward to the holidays, but I am also very conscious about how much time I can spend with certain family members, how much egg nog to have, and what years I should just fly to an island and retreat.
People lose their minds during the holidays - the stress of travel is just the beginning. At the airport, thousands and thousands of families are crossing the country to reconnect during this special time of year. The smiles and the giggles have just as much impact as the tears and the screaming matches. My heart breaks every day during this season, but is filled with the love that is pouring through this vehicle of family connection. The children are so excited to tell you they are going to Florida to see Grandpa and Santa will find them ...even in Orlando.
Or the thousands of Unaccompanied Minors who all have a story to tell you about skiing in Aspen, or how their dad is always late picking them up.
There is much to be said about unresolved family issues that explode during the second course of Christmas dinner. Aunt Madge makes a simple comment about Dad's job, "Hey, how did that new promotion work out", and Dad throws a biscuit across the table. Years of Aunt Madge "putting him down...he'll never be good enough", etc etc is what Dad heard. Meanwhile Mom is throwing back G & T's in the kitchen because Grandma has been hovering over the turkey all day, "helping".
Funny enough, as different as every household looks like, they are remarkably similar. Every family has their good times and their bad times. It's when they pull together at times like the holidays when each gets to see how special they are.
Spread love this season. Try to remember that everyone is hanging on to something that was way more important to them than you know, and just let it go.
Find the mistletoe, and let it go.
This Christmas..
You see the best of human spirit and kindness and the worst of mankind come out during the holidays. Just add liquor and too much sugar...
I look forward to the holidays, but I am also very conscious about how much time I can spend with certain family members, how much egg nog to have, and what years I should just fly to an island and retreat.
People lose their minds during the holidays - the stress of travel is just the beginning. At the airport, thousands and thousands of families are crossing the country to reconnect during this special time of year. The smiles and the giggles have just as much impact as the tears and the screaming matches. My heart breaks every day during this season, but is filled with the love that is pouring through this vehicle of family connection. The children are so excited to tell you they are going to Florida to see Grandpa and Santa will find them ...even in Orlando.
Or the thousands of Unaccompanied Minors who all have a story to tell you about skiing in Aspen, or how their dad is always late picking them up.
There is much to be said about unresolved family issues that explode during the second course of Christmas dinner. Aunt Madge makes a simple comment about Dad's job, "Hey, how did that new promotion work out", and Dad throws a biscuit across the table. Years of Aunt Madge "putting him down...he'll never be good enough", etc etc is what Dad heard. Meanwhile Mom is throwing back G & T's in the kitchen because Grandma has been hovering over the turkey all day, "helping".
Funny enough, as different as every household looks like, they are remarkably similar. Every family has their good times and their bad times. It's when they pull together at times like the holidays when each gets to see how special they are.
Spread love this season. Try to remember that everyone is hanging on to something that was way more important to them than you know, and just let it go.
Find the mistletoe, and let it go.
This Christmas..
Friday, December 17, 2010
May September Romance
Recently discussing with a friend about age, relationships, and compatibility - the topic of May September romance came up.
The concept of older men/ younger women is usually accompanied by the stereotype of gold diggers, whereas older women/ younger men equate the idea with cougars and sexual prowess of the older woman - a typical Mrs Robinson.
Why the disparity in concept for the same style relationship?
From HubPages:
Considering I spend most of my free time doing outdoors or athletic activities - I am a physical person; running, biking, hiking, skiing, traveling, playing. I can't imagine my life without sports and a physical outlet, or a partner to share those things.
I think as I get older I realize the same things that we look at men cockeyed for - chasing around hot bodies, thinking very selfishly - women, as we get older have the same thoughts. I simply believe we are more prone to have considerations of others which we tend to put before ourselves and our needs. Kids, parents, society - these are all factors in our decision making process. Whereas men don't tend to have the same priority in choosing a partner.
The concept of an arm-piece for a man in his September prime toting around a young hottie brings to light the blatant obvious. Men like toys - a little arm candy. What better accessory to that new Porsche than a twenty-four year old strapless dress in CFM heels? And for women it's no different, I could perch my purse on the bar but why not have Adonis hold it?
Who needs stimulating conversation at home?
I have had conversations with men and women, both, 20 years my junior, and I will be the first to admit, it is entertaining at best. There is no reference point. There is no commonality. I revert back to my statement above, the most we have in common is physical activity. On the slopes there is no age. At the top of a Fourteener, there is no age gap in exhilaration. But, at the bar afterward there could be large blocks of silence.
Part of what is so fantastic about meeting someone is sharing life experience; not just today, but the humor in tomorrow and the history of yesterday.
Here's the thing, everything in life is analyzed on some level. Age, race, class, success, power - all these things offer valid points on the speculation of success (or failure) of any relationship. Every relationship has it's reason for being, so to speak. We are still human beings, growing, learning at every level. If any relationship lasts longer than three dates in this day and age, bravo! Give yourself an "attaboy".
The concept of older men/ younger women is usually accompanied by the stereotype of gold diggers, whereas older women/ younger men equate the idea with cougars and sexual prowess of the older woman - a typical Mrs Robinson.
Why the disparity in concept for the same style relationship?
From HubPages:
"In general, the pros of the relationship include stability, learning from one another and lust. The latter is what tends to drive these relationships initially but that can be said of most relationships. It tends to merge into a sort of infatuation/appreciation that works for many couples over time. In general, these relationships tend to be more stable than other relationships because the older party tends to be patient and forgiving in a way that isn't true when dealing with your peers. The age difference tends to create a learning environment because each partner is in a different stage of life (and perhaps comes from different generational beliefs) which means that they are regularly faced with the opportunity to educate and inspire one another. These are all things that contribute to the positive end of the relationship.
On the flip side, there tend to be some power imbalances in these types of relationships. That stability can turn into a patronizing attitude that leads to resentment in the relationship. Additionally, there are a myriad of problems that being in different life stages can present. The biggest is whether and when to have children together. There are also problems with being in different career stages and having different priorities in life because of age. These are certainly problems that can be overcome but are challenges that tend to be present in the May-December romance." Kathryn Vercillo, author
Considering I spend most of my free time doing outdoors or athletic activities - I am a physical person; running, biking, hiking, skiing, traveling, playing. I can't imagine my life without sports and a physical outlet, or a partner to share those things.
I think as I get older I realize the same things that we look at men cockeyed for - chasing around hot bodies, thinking very selfishly - women, as we get older have the same thoughts. I simply believe we are more prone to have considerations of others which we tend to put before ourselves and our needs. Kids, parents, society - these are all factors in our decision making process. Whereas men don't tend to have the same priority in choosing a partner.
The concept of an arm-piece for a man in his September prime toting around a young hottie brings to light the blatant obvious. Men like toys - a little arm candy. What better accessory to that new Porsche than a twenty-four year old strapless dress in CFM heels? And for women it's no different, I could perch my purse on the bar but why not have Adonis hold it?
Who needs stimulating conversation at home?
I have had conversations with men and women, both, 20 years my junior, and I will be the first to admit, it is entertaining at best. There is no reference point. There is no commonality. I revert back to my statement above, the most we have in common is physical activity. On the slopes there is no age. At the top of a Fourteener, there is no age gap in exhilaration. But, at the bar afterward there could be large blocks of silence.
Part of what is so fantastic about meeting someone is sharing life experience; not just today, but the humor in tomorrow and the history of yesterday.
Here's the thing, everything in life is analyzed on some level. Age, race, class, success, power - all these things offer valid points on the speculation of success (or failure) of any relationship. Every relationship has it's reason for being, so to speak. We are still human beings, growing, learning at every level. If any relationship lasts longer than three dates in this day and age, bravo! Give yourself an "attaboy".
Friday, December 10, 2010
coercion
My meatballs have been called, "seduction meatballs". It was recently brought to my attention that I could likely get whatever wanted by preparing and serving them.
I like to think I would never use them in an evil manner, simply to coerce.
The concept of coercion is only successful when the person being coerced wants to do the task at hand anyway. Perhaps they are sitting on the fence. Undecided. Waiting for that push in any direction.
Meatballs are not going to convince a nun to commit murder. But they MAY inspire a few, "yes,dears",
and I will take them.
So everyone always asks, "what's in your meatballs?"
The ingredients themselves are not that outstanding. It's the aura of the meatballs that makes them special.
So, here is the recipe, and you can tell everyone you know, it's your own...because it will be ~
I like to think I would never use them in an evil manner, simply to coerce.
The concept of coercion is only successful when the person being coerced wants to do the task at hand anyway. Perhaps they are sitting on the fence. Undecided. Waiting for that push in any direction.
Meatballs are not going to convince a nun to commit murder. But they MAY inspire a few, "yes,dears",
and I will take them.
So everyone always asks, "what's in your meatballs?"
The ingredients themselves are not that outstanding. It's the aura of the meatballs that makes them special.
So, here is the recipe, and you can tell everyone you know, it's your own...because it will be ~
ground pork OR
lean ground beef
hot italian sausage
(or any combination of these items including lamb)
1 egg
bread crumbs (I prefer sourdough or French) at least 1 cup
diced pepper or jalapeno (about 2 TBLs)
salt and pepper to taste
lean ground beef
hot italian sausage
(or any combination of these items including lamb)
1 egg
bread crumbs (I prefer sourdough or French) at least 1 cup
diced pepper or jalapeno (about 2 TBLs)
salt and pepper to taste
The sauce:
Your favorite sauce
add one cup of your favorite wine - I prefer a pinot or merlot for the sauce
1 teas of Worcestershire sauce
dash of Luisiana hot sauce
Your favorite sauce
add one cup of your favorite wine - I prefer a pinot or merlot for the sauce
1 teas of Worcestershire sauce
dash of Luisiana hot sauce
make balls and drop in sauce
simmer until balls are thoroughly cooked (about 40 minutes) tossing in the sauce and stirring frequently
prepare your favorite pasta (I love angelhair, b/c that's what my Nana always made) and pour sauce (and balls) over pasta
sprinkle with parmesan
EAT
simmer until balls are thoroughly cooked (about 40 minutes) tossing in the sauce and stirring frequently
prepare your favorite pasta (I love angelhair, b/c that's what my Nana always made) and pour sauce (and balls) over pasta
sprinkle with parmesan
EAT
Still wondering what makes these balls so tasty?
It's the love of making them for your family or friends.
The love that goes into the balls it what makes them so wonderfully delicious.
It's the love of making them for your family or friends.
The love that goes into the balls it what makes them so wonderfully delicious.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Freedom
The subject of freedom has arisen in response to a blog on monogamy and marriage.
OSHO's POV on Marriage/ Freedom
The concept that marriage in fact restricts (and in effect denies) freedom(s).
More irony of our country.
We are one of the only countries that stands and fights for freedom. All freedoms: speech, carrying firearms, religion, a vote, etc. We built a declaration signed by all the important dudes of the time, and endorsed by all the other important dudes of the time, yet when it comes down to personal satisfaction, we don't seem to grasp this same concept.
We can fight for freedom as a country, but not as a couple?
Really?
This explains the breakdown in politics between groups, but it would seem reasonable if we can stand with a group of people who, in general maintain the same ideals for a lifetime (and yes there are exceptions to every rule), that we could maintain the same ideals and grow together with another person who in theory is the one person in life that has your back...for a lifetime.
I propose:
Freedom is a state of mind. No one holds you captive but yourself.
We let external things blind the reality of self.
and let others hold us back with their perceptions and restraints...
A partnership on any level should be the catalyst for developing ideas, and moving forward in this lifetime, not the opposite.
I believe what this fellow was implying was strictly physical. Restricting freedoms, simply implying the freedom to screw other women at will. Well, yes, if that is the case - Don't get married. But if freedom stands for something far more intelligent and fulfilling, and life encompassing, how can you possibly attain a greater freedom tan with those who are on your team? Whether it be a wife, or business partner, or country of people who hold the same truths and hold you accountable for being who you said when you signed up; "I will not cheat you in this business deal", "I will not steal money from you", "I will not deny you a vote in our best interests", "I will not put my penis in other women".
Seems simple to me.
All contracts are binding.
Freedom is a concept that most people do not take responsibility for, for themselves.
Freedom is not something anyone else can take from you.
Freedom is something you challenge yourself to maintain, and encourage others to seek.
It really boils right back down to integrity.
OSHO's POV on Marriage/ Freedom
The concept that marriage in fact restricts (and in effect denies) freedom(s).
More irony of our country.
We are one of the only countries that stands and fights for freedom. All freedoms: speech, carrying firearms, religion, a vote, etc. We built a declaration signed by all the important dudes of the time, and endorsed by all the other important dudes of the time, yet when it comes down to personal satisfaction, we don't seem to grasp this same concept.
We can fight for freedom as a country, but not as a couple?
Really?
This explains the breakdown in politics between groups, but it would seem reasonable if we can stand with a group of people who, in general maintain the same ideals for a lifetime (and yes there are exceptions to every rule), that we could maintain the same ideals and grow together with another person who in theory is the one person in life that has your back...for a lifetime.
I propose:
Freedom is a state of mind. No one holds you captive but yourself.
We let external things blind the reality of self.
and let others hold us back with their perceptions and restraints...
A partnership on any level should be the catalyst for developing ideas, and moving forward in this lifetime, not the opposite.
I believe what this fellow was implying was strictly physical. Restricting freedoms, simply implying the freedom to screw other women at will. Well, yes, if that is the case - Don't get married. But if freedom stands for something far more intelligent and fulfilling, and life encompassing, how can you possibly attain a greater freedom tan with those who are on your team? Whether it be a wife, or business partner, or country of people who hold the same truths and hold you accountable for being who you said when you signed up; "I will not cheat you in this business deal", "I will not steal money from you", "I will not deny you a vote in our best interests", "I will not put my penis in other women".
Seems simple to me.
All contracts are binding.
Freedom is a concept that most people do not take responsibility for, for themselves.
Freedom is not something anyone else can take from you.
Freedom is something you challenge yourself to maintain, and encourage others to seek.
It really boils right back down to integrity.
Sister Wives
On the heels of my blog about monogamy, I watched an Oprah episode today about a reality-TV polygamous family. I tried to listen with an open mind. I am still trying to wrap my head around why some guy would need or want four wives and sixteen kids.
Then I listened to the wives discuss how this relationship/ these relationships make them better women. They are able to put others before themselves. They can be more reflective instead of reactive.
This setup actually makes them better people.
So, my confusion, stems from a couple different issues I personally have with polygamy.
There are men all over the world with a wife in their home city and a lover in another city, or even in the same city. If this polygamy thing is so healthy, why aren't more people doing it, and why isn't it legal?
Why are people so judgmental of men with numerous baby-momma's? Is it just the ring they want to see on some woman's finger?
Polygamy itself. I don't like to share my glass of wine. I do not have girlfriends/ sister girls/ any woman I am willing to share my man with. Under no circumstances would it occur to me to have a part time relationship. "I'll take him Tue-Fri, and you can have him Sat-Monday".
No.
This being said, I understand, the reverse situation is deemed vulgar - women are not to take on another husband or male lover.
So, not only are you telling me I may only see you once or twice a week, but I can't even fulfill my own personal needs while you are loving my new BFF, who you are married to as well?
I don't think so.
I just don't get it.
I have friends I can open up to and share things with, and engage in an emotionally free relationship without sharing the man in my life. Women are supposed to have women in their lives that support who they are as women. Other, like souls, who you can laugh and cry and share secrets with - women who know who you are and still love you. No matter what.
They don't need to be sleeping with your husband.
Learning how to share oneself (which I believe is termed unconditional love) usually comes with having children - all these women have children and I would assume the gene that makes them capable of learning to love and give unconditionally. Again, not something you need a man, or 3 other women in your home (and bed) to teach you how to do.
Enlightenment comes from self-awareness, not some guy and 3 other chicks just as crazy and insecure as you.
Then I listened to the wives discuss how this relationship/ these relationships make them better women. They are able to put others before themselves. They can be more reflective instead of reactive.
This setup actually makes them better people.
So, my confusion, stems from a couple different issues I personally have with polygamy.
There are men all over the world with a wife in their home city and a lover in another city, or even in the same city. If this polygamy thing is so healthy, why aren't more people doing it, and why isn't it legal?
Why are people so judgmental of men with numerous baby-momma's? Is it just the ring they want to see on some woman's finger?
Polygamy itself. I don't like to share my glass of wine. I do not have girlfriends/ sister girls/ any woman I am willing to share my man with. Under no circumstances would it occur to me to have a part time relationship. "I'll take him Tue-Fri, and you can have him Sat-Monday".
No.
This being said, I understand, the reverse situation is deemed vulgar - women are not to take on another husband or male lover.
So, not only are you telling me I may only see you once or twice a week, but I can't even fulfill my own personal needs while you are loving my new BFF, who you are married to as well?
I don't think so.
I just don't get it.
I have friends I can open up to and share things with, and engage in an emotionally free relationship without sharing the man in my life. Women are supposed to have women in their lives that support who they are as women. Other, like souls, who you can laugh and cry and share secrets with - women who know who you are and still love you. No matter what.
They don't need to be sleeping with your husband.
Learning how to share oneself (which I believe is termed unconditional love) usually comes with having children - all these women have children and I would assume the gene that makes them capable of learning to love and give unconditionally. Again, not something you need a man, or 3 other women in your home (and bed) to teach you how to do.
Enlightenment comes from self-awareness, not some guy and 3 other chicks just as crazy and insecure as you.
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