This morning when I woke up, I turned my cell phone on and got ready to shower. My phone immediately went off and there was a voice message from last night from my sister.
Her 80 year old, kind, generous, lovely spirited grandmother had been shot and killed a couple blocks from her home.
Another RANDOM act of violence.
Black on Black crime.
Gun Violence.
Innocent bystander killed by a drive-by.
My sisters message was very powerful. We have different moms, and different maternal grandmothers, but we are very close and I consider her mom my mom. Note: our father was also killed by gunfire. But he lived a very different lifestyle. It was not random. He was not innocent.
Her message reminded me of how short and precious life is. She reminded me of my mantra, "Live every day like it's your last...don't take anything for granted...just LIVE."
She said, "Tomorrow is not promised."
This is a tragedy for everyone when something so unnecessary and violent smacks a community with it's internal hate. These problems will never cease. Teenagers with guns. Poverty. Gangs. Grandmothers driving their friends home getting shot in the head. Senseless. Her message was very emotional and reminded me of my struggle with staying positive. I feel tested often. I feel like LIFE sometimes sabotages my efforts at being positive. Hearing her voice, and feeling her anger. Internalizing that energy which can consume you if you let it, reminded me to stay calm. I took my shower. I went to work. I proceeded with my day. I didn't share my knowledge with anyone because I didn't know how to vocalize those feelings and stay positive. How can you stay positive? I understand her anger. I am angry.
I believe in karma.
I don't believe in personal retribution and vindictive behavior. Because of my belief in karma I turn the other cheek. I try to teach my kids to turn the other cheek. I try to love everyone, even when I get nothing back.
Just a couple weeks ago I wrote a blog about their being enough love in the world to go around. Today it's hard to share love. It's hard to look people in the eye. There is no music that can make this feeling go away right now.
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