Anyone with kids realizes that travel takes a lot of preparation.
Especially if you have kids.
Prep prep prep
Parents also have to have a certain amount of resilience and tons of patience.
I have traveled with my kids for the last 14 years and as challenging as it could have been, I consider myself organized and proactive. I anticipate almost every obstacle before it even thinks about popping up. I pride myself on being prepared for any kid challenge that might show up. I realize that my priorities are in line with my children being happy, but I don't over think preparing because my kids need it so much, as I also have the thought of other travelers in mind. If my kids are whining everyone suffers.
So, needless to say after successfully carting kids around the world for years and nurturing proficient young travelers of my own, I was shocked yesterday to see (not a single mom, but a mom and dad team) a family with 2 small children (ages 4 and 7) completely out of control.
Dad had mistakenly (giving him the benefit of the doubt) booked his ticket for the day they were traveling and booked the mom and the two children on the following day's flight.
Hahaha haaa
You will indeed think this is funny when the details follow.
The mom brings the two children to the waiting area to wait for dad to work out the details. Can they be re-booked for today? Can dad wait until tomorrow? Will the children be able to sit for 8-10 minutes without setting the airport afire and stabbing each other in their constant display of inability to behave for any length of time whatsoever.
The smaller child continually taunts the older child until the older child moves seat...to which the small child follows to taunt further. The mom at this point grabs the arm of the smaller child and shoves him into the seat from which he just arrived. The older child begins to whine, "what will we do, how will we get home, I wanna go home", to which the mom responds, in a similar whiny tone, "I don't know what we're gonna do", as if they were stranded on a desert island with no food, covered in zsi zsi flies, and cannibals were hot on their trail.
The father saunters over with their caravan of baggage from their 1 week vacation, 2 states over, and states the facts, "it will cost $205 dollars to change their tickets, or they will have to wait until tomorrow". $205 dollars? cha ching, this sounds like nothing for a family of four, and I'm broke.
On the other hand, big deal, wait until tomorrow. A hotel room is $50 bucks, suck it up - these kids don't have to be anywhere.
But, these are things rational people think. What happened is this:
The mom puts her head in her hands and begins to weep. One seat over mind you. I'm almost in her purse, we're so close. She begins to cry out, "I can't travel with the kids alone". To which dad responds, "I have to go to work". To which the kids begin to torture one another relentlessly, while the businessman on the other side of them begins to wriggle in his seat.
Now, I'm thinking, "what the hell is going on here"?
Then, one of the kids wanders about 5 feet from where they are sitting and the mom leaps up grabs him by he arm, marches him back to the seat, and he begins to scream. At which point dad, pinches, pokes, something physical quietly, and tells him to be quiet. Then the kids starts wailing even more. Now mom holds her hand over the mouth of the child demanding he be silent.
The entire family is an emotional mess.
The whole while, the older child making comments on the behavior of the younger one as if he was so above the antics he was, in fact, participating in passively.
The older child starts shouting, "what are we gonna do, what are we gonna do".
Dad makes a phone call to have the family picked up by grandparents...yes, they have family...still in the airport area. Then quietly says to mom, "can you travel alone with the kids"? To which she gets a stiff upper chin and says in the most passive aggressive voice I have ever actually heard outloud, "I will travel alone with them, you have to work, and we can't do without". Imagine Eeyore.
I could have vomited on the spot. It was the worst piece of drama I've ever seen - from tears to stiff upper lip in 45 seconds, with a spot of violent outrage sandwiched in between.
And from such an average looking family.
They didn't look like drama.
I caught the glance of the businessman on the other side of this theatrical mess looking at me, and I refused to make eye contact for fear of my reaction. This wasn't funny, it was pathetic and crazy, but so outrageous, it was difficult to have a rational reaction.
After they moseyed away it occurred to me this was probably a well oiled plot by dad to ditch this craziness and escape.
Friday, August 27, 2010
Friday, August 6, 2010
3 Angels
Today was the beginning of the last vacation before the beginning of the new school year.
I try and take the kids somewhere every year so we can bond and touch base before the school year starts and time gets away from us again. It is an opportunity to talk about everything they are anticipating as well as the summer events thus far.
Catchup time and new beginnings.
It's also an opportunity to capture memories of childhood and the good things we all remembered as kids - the chance to pass it down. Beaches and bike rides, summers end, and road trips...the good things that we remembered about being a kid and of our parents.
This trip held a little more depth for me because I knew I had some lingering personal issues that were hanging like an emotional brooch around my neck. I wanted to keep everything separate yet get the closure I so desperately need.
The flight to Los Angeles was full but we were told there were enough seats for all three of us. Super! One more stress off my back. We boarded and sweet, I got an exit aisle seat with one child seated behind me, and the other in the row ahead of me. No worries.
Then I noticed a commotion and realized someone did not have a seat. I volunteered to ride Fourth Jumpseat (with the fight attendants) so no one would have to exit the aircraft, and the flight commenced.
The Flight attendants - the 3 Angels who were sent to me, in my like form (as God has indicated they would be), were funny, and sweet, and all strong in faith.
Their similar demeanor's to mine engaged me.
One was extremely funny and used colloquialisms that I used and had an edge about her. One took her job very seriously, yet was quiet and thoughtful. The last was strong and serious, but worked to maintain her sense of self in the light of others. They all spoke to my personality, yet all three together pulled me into
Their lightness of being held my attention. Their words moved me and spoke to my heart and my faith and I realized I was lucky enough to be acutely aware of one of those moments when the Universe is speaking to you. And I listened.
This is what they told me:
"You are strong"
"Trust your instincts"
"We can't pick a man for ourselves, we have to let God show us who He has picked for us"
"All that glitters is not gold"
"When you find "the one", he will tell you, he will pursue you. You will know."
I left with my heart feeling lifted and knowing how to get through one more day because someone sent me 3 angels to help me on my journey.
Today, I needed that.
"Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you,
you'd walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life there is
only one set of footprints.
I don't understand why when I needed you most
you would leave me."
The Lord replied "My precious, precious child,
I love you and would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering,
when you see only one set of footprints in the sand,
it was then that I carried you."
I try and take the kids somewhere every year so we can bond and touch base before the school year starts and time gets away from us again. It is an opportunity to talk about everything they are anticipating as well as the summer events thus far.
Catchup time and new beginnings.
It's also an opportunity to capture memories of childhood and the good things we all remembered as kids - the chance to pass it down. Beaches and bike rides, summers end, and road trips...the good things that we remembered about being a kid and of our parents.
This trip held a little more depth for me because I knew I had some lingering personal issues that were hanging like an emotional brooch around my neck. I wanted to keep everything separate yet get the closure I so desperately need.
The flight to Los Angeles was full but we were told there were enough seats for all three of us. Super! One more stress off my back. We boarded and sweet, I got an exit aisle seat with one child seated behind me, and the other in the row ahead of me. No worries.
Then I noticed a commotion and realized someone did not have a seat. I volunteered to ride Fourth Jumpseat (with the fight attendants) so no one would have to exit the aircraft, and the flight commenced.
The Flight attendants - the 3 Angels who were sent to me, in my like form (as God has indicated they would be), were funny, and sweet, and all strong in faith.
One was extremely funny and used colloquialisms that I used and had an edge about her. One took her job very seriously, yet was quiet and thoughtful. The last was strong and serious, but worked to maintain her sense of self in the light of others. They all spoke to my personality, yet all three together pulled me into
Their lightness of being held my attention. Their words moved me and spoke to my heart and my faith and I realized I was lucky enough to be acutely aware of one of those moments when the Universe is speaking to you. And I listened.
This is what they told me:
"You are strong"
"Trust your instincts"
"We can't pick a man for ourselves, we have to let God show us who He has picked for us"
"All that glitters is not gold"
"When you find "the one", he will tell you, he will pursue you. You will know."
I left with my heart feeling lifted and knowing how to get through one more day because someone sent me 3 angels to help me on my journey.
Today, I needed that.
"Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you,
you'd walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life there is
only one set of footprints.
I don't understand why when I needed you most
you would leave me."
The Lord replied "My precious, precious child,
I love you and would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering,
when you see only one set of footprints in the sand,
it was then that I carried you."
Friday, July 30, 2010
Only on Fridays
Today I knew would be the best Friday yet.
I had big plans for a fantastic day. Starting with a short, 3 mile run, I just wanted to get the face flushed and stretch my body a bit.
As I ran through downtown, I felt like a Nike commercial, feet hitting the pavement, cars around me, the homeless and the business people brushing past with much and no determination whatsoever.
I had a pedicure and lunch planned with Sweet Andee who always makes me feel better about myself with her positive outlook framed by a firm grip on reality and honest rhetoric. She is my breath of fresh air.
I ran errands and headed home to start a project which would take up my afternoon while distracting me, all the while keeping me out of trouble and keeping my mind clear for the evening.
Then phone calls for Happy Hour and more socializing with friends - Which is, by all accounts, the best way I could spend any day. Taking care of my body, clearing my mind, writing and sharing myself with my friends.
Who could ask for a better day?
The down side of this is I would love to do this everyday, so finding a way to balance - keeping all this good stuff happening on a regular basis has been my challenge, but I did come up with 3 new ideas for writing projects and if each day only had 6 more hours, I could write them all.
And how did Friday come to have such an impact on me?
This is the real question.
I had big plans for a fantastic day. Starting with a short, 3 mile run, I just wanted to get the face flushed and stretch my body a bit.
I had a pedicure and lunch planned with Sweet Andee who always makes me feel better about myself with her positive outlook framed by a firm grip on reality and honest rhetoric. She is my breath of fresh air.
I ran errands and headed home to start a project which would take up my afternoon while distracting me, all the while keeping me out of trouble and keeping my mind clear for the evening.
Then phone calls for Happy Hour and more socializing with friends - Which is, by all accounts, the best way I could spend any day. Taking care of my body, clearing my mind, writing and sharing myself with my friends.
Who could ask for a better day?
The down side of this is I would love to do this everyday, so finding a way to balance - keeping all this good stuff happening on a regular basis has been my challenge, but I did come up with 3 new ideas for writing projects and if each day only had 6 more hours, I could write them all.
And how did Friday come to have such an impact on me?
This is the real question.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Perception is Reality
This topic has come up numerous times in the last month with various friends.
"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are." ~Anais Nin
Our experiences, our histories, our perception molds everything - who we are.
It's funny, you can be at a party and an incident can happen and ten different people at the party recount ten different versions of what happened... And they will all be right.
Any event has specific particles which makeup the action, but interpretation is always subjective. Are we even capable of monitoring an event and not letting our feelings assist in the interpretation? Everything we see, hear, touch and smell has a knee jerk reaction, defined by experience. Every experience is owned by perception. Even objective journalists, judges, ambassadors can't help having a feeling associated with every experience, even if they suppress it. As humans are we brilliant enough to separate the two?
We exist as "feeling" beings for a reason.
We love.
We own passion.
We pride ourselves on being intellectual beings, yet clearly affected by experience and feeling.
Our passions ignite change.
Yet we rally for equality and fairness.
"All's fair in love and war", is the epitome of our self-service. Nothing is fair. Or equal.
It only exists because we try to balance our intellect with our base human response.
Who you are is only based on how you act. And why others perceive you as who you are is solely based on their reaction to your actions.
You can be whoever you want in this world, and your actions do indeed define you, whether you believe in everyone else's perception or not.
"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are." ~Anais Nin
Our experiences, our histories, our perception molds everything - who we are.
It's funny, you can be at a party and an incident can happen and ten different people at the party recount ten different versions of what happened... And they will all be right.
Any event has specific particles which makeup the action, but interpretation is always subjective. Are we even capable of monitoring an event and not letting our feelings assist in the interpretation? Everything we see, hear, touch and smell has a knee jerk reaction, defined by experience. Every experience is owned by perception. Even objective journalists, judges, ambassadors can't help having a feeling associated with every experience, even if they suppress it. As humans are we brilliant enough to separate the two?
We exist as "feeling" beings for a reason.
We love.
We own passion.
We pride ourselves on being intellectual beings, yet clearly affected by experience and feeling.
Our passions ignite change.
Yet we rally for equality and fairness.
"All's fair in love and war", is the epitome of our self-service. Nothing is fair. Or equal.
It only exists because we try to balance our intellect with our base human response.
Who you are is only based on how you act. And why others perceive you as who you are is solely based on their reaction to your actions.
You can be whoever you want in this world, and your actions do indeed define you, whether you believe in everyone else's perception or not.
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Public restrooms and common courtesy
WTF people?!?
I work in a high traffic area.
In 2009, the tenth busiest airport in the world - over 50 million passengers traveled through Denver International Airport.
"DIA was voted Best Airport in North America by readers of Business Traveler Magazine five years in a row (2005–2009) and was named "America's Best Run Airport" by Time in 2002." (wikipedia)
I go to work with the knowledge that thousands and thousands of people are going to walk past me at some point during the course of the day.
Many of these people have to go to the bathroom. Makes sense. Passengers are told to arrive at the airport two hours prior to their departure. Sometimes there are delays. The airport is littered with restaurants and bars. It is inevitable that at some point or another, every single person will have to use the bathroom.
I am generally at the airport for a minimum of nine hours per day. Some days I tap out at eighteen hours. I probably use the restroom four to six times per day, at a minimum.
90% of the time I enter the bathroom stall, there is urine on the seat.
Every time I walk in, I know I will have to wipe the seat before I pull the wrapper (hanging silently, yet politely above the toilet) out and place it on the toilet seat. Do people not know what the paper wrap is for? Are people too lazy to pull one out and lay it atop the seat before they piss all over it? Do some people think their aim is so amazing, they do not need the toilet cover? Because whatever the reason - IT'S WRONG.
You people who don't have the courtesy to put a FREE toilet cover on the seat you sit on, or sit over, or squat atop - whatever the hell you are doing in there, are pissing off the rest of the population who has to clean up after you, or God forbid, accidentally sit in your piss drops.
And explain this to me - when you stand up and see the piss droplets on the seat, why don't you wipe them off? Are you so selfish and trifling that you think, "no one knows I splattered and I don't give a F*ck".
I know.
I go in the bathroom stall behind you and YOU SUCK!
And the only thought that gives me any satisfaction as I squat above the toilet on my break, (wishing I was home comfortably sitting on my clean seat), after smiling at you and wishing you the best (and safest) flight ever, is the knowledge that karma's a bitch. One day, while you are grimacing because you accidentally sat in someone else's piss; as you reach to find a scrap of toilet paper to wipe your wet cheek...and there's none there, you will possibly think to yourself, "This is my piss. I did this to someone else and the world has finally revolved in their favor".
I work in a high traffic area.
In 2009, the tenth busiest airport in the world - over 50 million passengers traveled through Denver International Airport.
"DIA was voted Best Airport in North America by readers of Business Traveler Magazine five years in a row (2005–2009) and was named "America's Best Run Airport" by Time in 2002." (wikipedia)
I go to work with the knowledge that thousands and thousands of people are going to walk past me at some point during the course of the day.
Many of these people have to go to the bathroom. Makes sense. Passengers are told to arrive at the airport two hours prior to their departure. Sometimes there are delays. The airport is littered with restaurants and bars. It is inevitable that at some point or another, every single person will have to use the bathroom.
I am generally at the airport for a minimum of nine hours per day. Some days I tap out at eighteen hours. I probably use the restroom four to six times per day, at a minimum.
90% of the time I enter the bathroom stall, there is urine on the seat.
Every time I walk in, I know I will have to wipe the seat before I pull the wrapper (hanging silently, yet politely above the toilet) out and place it on the toilet seat. Do people not know what the paper wrap is for? Are people too lazy to pull one out and lay it atop the seat before they piss all over it? Do some people think their aim is so amazing, they do not need the toilet cover? Because whatever the reason - IT'S WRONG.
You people who don't have the courtesy to put a FREE toilet cover on the seat you sit on, or sit over, or squat atop - whatever the hell you are doing in there, are pissing off the rest of the population who has to clean up after you, or God forbid, accidentally sit in your piss drops.
And explain this to me - when you stand up and see the piss droplets on the seat, why don't you wipe them off? Are you so selfish and trifling that you think, "no one knows I splattered and I don't give a F*ck".
I know.
I go in the bathroom stall behind you and YOU SUCK!
And the only thought that gives me any satisfaction as I squat above the toilet on my break, (wishing I was home comfortably sitting on my clean seat), after smiling at you and wishing you the best (and safest) flight ever, is the knowledge that karma's a bitch. One day, while you are grimacing because you accidentally sat in someone else's piss; as you reach to find a scrap of toilet paper to wipe your wet cheek...and there's none there, you will possibly think to yourself, "This is my piss. I did this to someone else and the world has finally revolved in their favor".
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Battle for the Boot
Remember kickball?
Being in elementary school and playing kickball on recess was the best shit ever. Fast forward twenty years... add beer, hot girls and make it a Sunday Funday activity. Wanna play?
All the cool kids are doing it.
Kickball has become the new hotness - the sport of choice for adult recreation. With groups such as WAKA (World Adult Kickball Association), with kickball teams all over the nation; WASA and DKBC, right here in Colorado represent a national trend for this comeback sport.
The Denver Kickball Coalition seems to be the recreational group of choice for all the local hipsters. Sponsored by the Hi-Dive and Sputnik, well known, Denver hipster bars, DKBC's reputation as a league to be reckoned with was hard earned and their respect well deserved.
The documentary, Battle for the Boot, tells the five year history of DKBC, driven by interviews with those responsible for the foundation of the league, and the players themselves. The film itself showcases actual game footage highlighted by character driven interviews. The game itself is only topped by the players' love of beer and music. This is probably one of the easiest documentaries to watch since the THS documentary on Hugh Hefner and the Playboy empire. In fact, there was some comparability to the interview(s) with DKBC Founder, Joe Phillips, and Hugh Hefner in their likeablity factor, ease in front of the camera and story telling capabilities (among other things).
As a film major myself, I have so much respect for Indie films and those that make the time to pursue their passion. Huge hi-five for Ryan Demers, Paul Pendell and everyone responsible for the making of this local documentary.
If you get a chance to see the film - do!
Support local artists...and play kickball!
Check out the websites for more information on the film and DKBC.
Battle for the Boot
DKBC
Being in elementary school and playing kickball on recess was the best shit ever. Fast forward twenty years... add beer, hot girls and make it a Sunday Funday activity. Wanna play?
All the cool kids are doing it.
Kickball has become the new hotness - the sport of choice for adult recreation. With groups such as WAKA (World Adult Kickball Association), with kickball teams all over the nation; WASA and DKBC, right here in Colorado represent a national trend for this comeback sport.
The Denver Kickball Coalition seems to be the recreational group of choice for all the local hipsters. Sponsored by the Hi-Dive and Sputnik, well known, Denver hipster bars, DKBC's reputation as a league to be reckoned with was hard earned and their respect well deserved.
The documentary, Battle for the Boot, tells the five year history of DKBC, driven by interviews with those responsible for the foundation of the league, and the players themselves. The film itself showcases actual game footage highlighted by character driven interviews. The game itself is only topped by the players' love of beer and music. This is probably one of the easiest documentaries to watch since the THS documentary on Hugh Hefner and the Playboy empire. In fact, there was some comparability to the interview(s) with DKBC Founder, Joe Phillips, and Hugh Hefner in their likeablity factor, ease in front of the camera and story telling capabilities (among other things).
As a film major myself, I have so much respect for Indie films and those that make the time to pursue their passion. Huge hi-five for Ryan Demers, Paul Pendell and everyone responsible for the making of this local documentary.
If you get a chance to see the film - do!
Support local artists...and play kickball!
Battle for the Boot from Ryan Demers on Vimeo.
Check out the websites for more information on the film and DKBC.
Battle for the Boot
DKBC
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Train of thought...bear with me
"When we live and speak the truth, we free ourselves to to love well and create the space for someone else to love us." Gary Chapman, Love as a way of life
The above statement is the best summation for the frustration I haven't been able to shake in regards to receiving love from friends and family.
I have worked to create this space, yet find all these rules and barriers in place in regards to others expectations of who I should be.
The challenge of living with integrity is the knowledge that being who I am 100% leaves a lot of people feeling out of the loop. I am blessed to see my circle of friends is becming more aligned with who I am and who I trust, moreso than "do as I say, not as I do'ers".
One of the reasons we are witnessing the downfall of society in this generation is the actions have finally caught up with all the liars of the last decades. The continuum of living outside the realm of fact, or money, or realness - the reality of "credit". Because whether the credit of non-existent funds, or the credit of bullshit relationships, eventually it all catches up to you.
When you have a heart attack, who is there to take you to the hospital?
When you get caught pilfering from your company, and not one friend stood up to tell you "maybe you shouldn't do that - I thought you loved this job", yet all shake their heads when you lose your job and possible get arrested; who built that?
When you feel like not one person you have built relationships in the last 2 years show up, where does the concept of, "what's real" come into play?
You live where you build.
I am trying to build a "cash only" lifestyle.
Put your money where your mouth is.
Stand up for your beliefs.
Share yourself.
And with this ideal, I put down my expectations. The innate human need to believe that what you put out there will come back to you. The need for genuine, unadulterated, unconditional, flat-out-balls-to-the-wall, honest love.
...and that sucks, because I was raised in a fairy tale generation, and have spent my entire life trying to retrain myself.
The above statement is the best summation for the frustration I haven't been able to shake in regards to receiving love from friends and family.
I have worked to create this space, yet find all these rules and barriers in place in regards to others expectations of who I should be.
The challenge of living with integrity is the knowledge that being who I am 100% leaves a lot of people feeling out of the loop. I am blessed to see my circle of friends is becming more aligned with who I am and who I trust, moreso than "do as I say, not as I do'ers".
One of the reasons we are witnessing the downfall of society in this generation is the actions have finally caught up with all the liars of the last decades. The continuum of living outside the realm of fact, or money, or realness - the reality of "credit". Because whether the credit of non-existent funds, or the credit of bullshit relationships, eventually it all catches up to you.
When you have a heart attack, who is there to take you to the hospital?
When you get caught pilfering from your company, and not one friend stood up to tell you "maybe you shouldn't do that - I thought you loved this job", yet all shake their heads when you lose your job and possible get arrested; who built that?
When you feel like not one person you have built relationships in the last 2 years show up, where does the concept of, "what's real" come into play?
You live where you build.
I am trying to build a "cash only" lifestyle.
Put your money where your mouth is.
Stand up for your beliefs.
Share yourself.
And with this ideal, I put down my expectations. The innate human need to believe that what you put out there will come back to you. The need for genuine, unadulterated, unconditional, flat-out-balls-to-the-wall, honest love.
...and that sucks, because I was raised in a fairy tale generation, and have spent my entire life trying to retrain myself.
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