The morning drive to school.
Early morning.
Lights on.
Me and the Girl.
My teenage girl.
Madelene is trying out for the high school soccer team. She has played most of her life, so this is no surprise. We talked about the physical examination which is required, and in the discussion about health - family health history came up.
I told Maddi how heart disease and cancer runs in our family. I told her of my fear of having a heart attack and she seemed surprised (due to my tender age of 41). But, realistically speaking, my natural grandfather's, my uncle's and my cousin either died in their 40's of a heart attack, or had some heart issue by the time they were 40 years old. This is not uncommon in my family. Maddi reminded me that these were the men in the family, so probability remains low that I will die of a heart attack. Maybe, but statistics show more women dying of heart disease - and heart issues going unnoticed and untreated because of these same theories.
I told her I didn't think I would die anytime soon, but I might have a little attack, quickly followed by a come to Jesus - which sparked an entire new conversation on what a, "come to Jesus" was. I laughed so hard. Then I got serious again - I have had a lot of these moments lately. I don't know if it is the new year, or my position in life, or pre-menopause - I can't tell you what is causing these feelings for life to rise up lately. But they are overwhelming and necessary. I looked at her with all the love in my heart and told her - I was not planning on dying, but if I did, I wanted her to know how she has changed my life. That she is special and beautiful and smart and the whole world will laugh around her because of the joy she brings to a room. I told her I am lucky to be her mom and if I never got the opportunity to tell her how special she was again (I could get hit by a car today), I wanted her to know for the rest of her life, she changed my life.
She told me to pick her up at 4:30.
I love teenagers.
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